Thinking about starting dating again after the death of a spouse or partner can bring out feelings of betrayal or guilt. It can also trigger feelings of concern and confusion in family and friends.
For those who have lost a partner and are looking to date again, here are some tips to help you:
How soon should I start dating again?
Everyone is different, and there is no specific time period that you should wait before dating again. Some people take weeks, others take years. Whatever you choose to do, and however long you take, don’t let others tell you you’re moving too fast or waiting too long.
Why do I feel guilty about wanting to date again?
Feelings of guilt will subside over time as you date, especially when you find that special someone. If the guilt’s not subsiding, you might not be ready to date again. If this is the case, give dating a break for a while and try it again when you feel you are more up to it.
Is it okay to talk about my deceased Partner?
Unless you’re dating someone you knew previously, and they are already familiar with your past, they are going to naturally be curious about your previous relationship. Answer questions he or she may have, but don’t spend all your time talking about it, be interested in what your date has to say and move on to getting to know them.
What if I am out of practice of dating?
Most dates will understand if they know it has been awhile since you dated. If you forget to open the door for your date, or talk about your past a bit too much, don’t worry now. But don’t make the same mistakes over and over. Learn from them and continue moving forward. You’ll be surprised how fast you get in to it.
What if I want to take things slow?
Don’t feel bad if you find yourself missing the intimacy of having a relationship. It’s completely normal. If you’re on a date and it’s going well, don’t be afraid to take things slow. It can save you and your date a lot of emotional heartache if you wait to make sure what you’re doing is because you care for the other person, and not because you miss the intimacy that you had in the past.