Machpin 

About me: Firstly before I start I just want to point out I absolutely abhor dishonesty and apologise for any possible offence caused to those that find themselves inflicted in such a malevolent manner. Possessing such a strong sense of duty I feel it necessary to point this out, as will no doubt be evidently clear from further reading and discovering what a true paragon of absolute virtue I really am.

I am a simple man in so many diverse and complex ways, which a
lifetime would never suffice to prove enough time to tell you who I am, however what follows is a very condensed account.

My life so far has consisted of several roles though my current employ is perhaps the role I am most renown for. I would like to point out that even though in this line of work lies and distrust is prolific I always stick the right side of honesty though I am contractually obligated to not recollect quite a lot of things.

I meet many people in my work and if yours is of the diplomatic nature for your country then maybe our paths have crossed once before, perhaps even intimately. Oh, if your name is Tatiana then I’d like to hear from you again regarding some underpants of mine. Anyways, back to me. I am a very gentle caring man and have a lot of time for the fairer sex and if your vital statistics add up then you may be in luck.

But before you read on I must admit to you now that I am not perfect. I, like many of us, have that baggage, a wife and some blasted kids scattered about the odd country here and there. Fortunately though due to large doses of radiation poisoning from the dangerous nature of my employment my molecular structure is constantly evolving and has rendered pending child support claims null and void. What a result! Equally, as another side bonus of this radiation poisoning, it seems to have cleared up most of my sexually transmitted diseases. Yet another result for the ladies!

As I am sure you are aware there are many occupational hazards to my line of work, one of these is I am constantly having to pull out, quite literally sometimes when a jealous husband turns up and as a result don’t have time to put on my quite expensive underpants. So when work permits and as a way to relax and equally as a good way of spending time with the wife and a few of those darn rug rats that I am obligated under court order to resemble some sort of father figure to, I like to take vacations with them where I retrace my steps to track down these lost undergarments. So if you can see yourself perhaps fulfilling this type of courtesan role with occasional babysitting duties then maybe you are the girl for me.

Anyways lets conclude. Through the nature of my work it remains compulsory for me to try out many different models of the female variety, none of which mean anything to me of course, apart from you Isabella, oh and Francesca, nice wrist action. So if you''re not afraid of a real man that knows how to treat a woman then drop me a line so I can pencil you in for a thorough test drive.
 

About you: Just wanted to further reiterate that i am only looking for friendship on here now as I am now in a relationship and have found that even with having a status of "looking for friendship only" that this still can be misread, so didnt want to mislead anyone so thought I''d state it here so there is no doubt.

oh and yup, she has me by the balls ;)