I've realised it's my own fault

Ahhh Chris...thanks for that...what a nice thing to say!!! Are you listening cheeky chops??? (He knows who he is lol!!)
M x

Pleasure

x

(yes take note Cheeky Chops) (whoever you may be!) :-)

but thats the thing Mysti...if we really love ourselves and are in tune with every aspect of us then we really dont give a shit what others think.

Contrary to popular belief life is not about pleasing others, its about pleasing yourself in a way that makes others want to be a part of your life.

Mike (man in therapists hat)

How much do you charge?????

Yep, you're right of course...it's just hard putting it into practice!!!

Hang on I'll chant MYSTI IS A LOVELY (IF A BIT WOBBLY) PERSON
MYSTI IS A LOVELY (IF A BIT........

Bored with that ..how about:

Dear Mysti, I think you're fab and you really can sing even tho' no-one else thinks so and you look drop dead gorgeous in those new sunglasses you bought (good choice) and they are NOT wrinkles they are expression lines from laughing a lot and there may be a lot of you but you'll certainly keep somenoe warm during those long winter nights.

Lots of love ...keep up the fabulousness

Here's looking at you kid

from Mysti xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

How's that Hatman??

Errr....yep mysti..erm....you got it lol

Mike (man in slowly backing towards the door hat)

lol.....I can be a bit scary....BOO!!!
m X

BTW Hatty...there's a guy on the site who can't sleep....I don't half worry about him....everytime I see him...there he is 'I can't sleep baby' he says...and I think awwwwww.......What would you suggest for him Hatty seeing as you have your therapists hat on...Quiet Life pills are quite good......I don't half worry about you sir if you are reading this ;0)
M x

then perhaps I would suggest to the poor fellow some vigorous exercise to remove some of his excess energy...failing that super glueing ones eyelids shut can often give the impression of sleep, if not the relaxedness (think I just made that word up :p)

Mike (man in docs hat)

yes...the poor chap is def in need of some relaxedness......he hasn't been able to sleep for ages now.......I think he may be crying out for a particular type of vigorous exercise.................................................................................................................................................and on that bombshell.........I'm going to have to stop faffing about on here (pleasant as it is) and do some work cos I've got to hand my folder in tomoz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Catch you later x

Mysti

If you give me two minutes I can download a certificate and laminate it and then I have evidence that I'm a bone fide shrink!

I'm listening...

I do have one probing question for you Mysti...

who is cheeky chops?????

;);)

He's a guy from here who turned into a real guy from fleshyland.........but we had a falling out......and he's gone awol........and like Captain Oates he may be some time...........and he has cheeky chops!!
M x

oh no, you went over to the dark side!!!

was it like they say it is...3 dimentional people who walk and talk???

stay here in the safety of the 2d world, I don't want to be alone....

:):)

Thanks, Mouse, Shar, Mysti, Mike & Chris - it really does help to know there are people out there who actually do understand that sh*t does happen and sometimes it can destroy people. I guess the strong ones pull through in the end and the scars manifest themselves in ways that only those who have been through the same thing can appreciate.
Self Esteem - loads of books on it I know but some people find it easy to recognise when it's at an all time low, others don't. It took me a while and I've read up on it and know what needs to be done but like you Mysti, I have trouble liking myself. And Mike, yes I agree that if you don't love yourself, how can you expect others to love you? - wise words indeed. But what stops me in my tracks is when people tell me I'm lovely, gorgeous, sexy, funny, intelligent why then do I find it easier to believe I am unattractive, sarcastic, useless, miserable and unworthy. You see if I was all those appealing things and not the negative traits, why didn't my husband of 25 years see them? What I'm trying to say is that it takes a lot of time and sorting out in our heads to learn to love ourselves - I think it's also called 'coming to terms' with that 'sh*t' - and perhaps some of us are slow learners.

Hey! what a way to put a man right off you eh? But I love these threads when they provoke such emotion! Bring it on!
Meltingheart x

"...perhaps some of us are slow learners."

then I need to be in the special needs class!!!
I know I am sarcastic, unattractive and unworthy.

If people tell me I'm lovely, funny etc, I wonder what they are after.

Words are easy to say, it's actions that say so much more.

I don't care if it puts men off...
it helps to know you're not alone with the negative thoughts that creep in from time to time.

Nice post Melting. I have to say tho' that I do like myself. I like the person I am anyway...not necessarily what I see in the mirror....but none of us can help getting older. This is going to sound terrible but I've only ever been used by men...apart from my husband but he just wasn't bothered...never made me feel special or anything like that. You can't help having these hang ups cos of past baggage. But I don't want anyone to think I don't like myself cos I do....I'm gonna have a Mysti is Great T shirt printed!!!
It is a bit sad tho' cos the one I wanted (I work with) and he dumped me. I'm very popular and well liked at work and I think to myself 'everyone thinks I'm so lovely....why doesn't he?? why wasn't I good enough??'

Shall we all go to self esteem classes???? ;0) x

Exactly Mousebat - so what actions do you think would say what we want to hear?
Melting x

HI Mysti - I'd get detention if I went to those classes and end up having to write 100 lines - 'I must try harder' lol
Melting x

Now that's a tough question, Melting!

It requires a lot of thought.

i agree that we all have our own issues - mine is that i cant believe it if anyone doesnt find me attractive, weird eh.